Our New Normal, our journey with Alzheimer

  I know I haven’t posted lately, I am going to try to be more regular, I think it will help my mental health. Last night at dinner, Bob had some steak left, he said I will give it to the dogs and I said don’t do that, I had already fed them. I said here is a sandwich bag, put it in here and we will give it to them tomorrow. I watched him put it in the bag and seal it up. I walked into the family room and he said, Milo got all the steak out of his dry food. I said what? I walked back into the kitchen and he took out the steak from the sealed bag and gave it to the dogs….. I said why did you do that, we were saving it for tomorrow? He said I don’t know. It is so sad. I have to constantly watch what he is doing, I have been burned so often. I write him notes but he forgets to look at them. Brian said it is like having a toddler, you have to watch him constantly. The good news he can still clean bathrooms. He forgets where the rags are but can still clean.

  The disease is starting to progress more.  Bob is doing everything he can do to try and delay the progress but his short term memory is getting a lot worse, which makes him ask the same questions over and over to me, like 10 minutes a part.  It gets draining on me but I know it is 10 times worse on him.

December 28, 2019 - Bob woke up around 6:30am in a full panic attack. He said get me a pill. He said he didn't know what day it was or what he did yesterday.  I got him a pill and some water told him to go sit in the family room. I got him some coffee and turned on the tv for him. He calmed down a little. An hour later he said he felt a little better. He ate some breakfast and he said the pill is working just feels a little shaky.  He will rest today and nothing else to do, so I think he will be ok. 2019 had been a pretty good year. Bob's disease is progressing slowly so we are thankful. We seem to have to adjust how we do things often.  Like now when he leaves on his own, which is rare, he will always have to have a note and the last thing on the note will always be come home. I have more patience with Bob but some days can be a challenge when you get asked the same question 5 times.  I always try and tell him this is not his fault, it is the disease but it is h...

December 27, 2019 - Bob went to pay our personal property and real estate taxes, we talked before he went. We decided to pay with our credit card. He left and about 10 minutes later I got a call from him, panicked, he said he thinks he lost the checking account book.  I told him he did not because he didn't have it.  I said you were paying by credit card.  He was really upset.  He said they wouldn't accept credit card except online. I said come home or sit in the car for a few minutes till you calm down.  He said I am coming home.  When he came home he was upset but did not want to take a pill.  After a while he calmed down and worked in the basement on his bird house and listened to his old records.

June 20, 2019 - We left for Hawaii for 10 days.  Bob did pretty good, no panic attacks but he could not figure out how to get to his room in the hotel.  Someone was always assigned to be with him. I did get him a medical assist necklace where we would be contacted if he got lost and he wore that everyday. Overall he really enjoyed the vacation with our whole family.

April 19, 2019 - Bob had another panic attack at Walmart. We miscommunicated and he did not know where to go to meet me.

March 19, 2019 - We found out Bob does not qualify for the Trailblazer study. He had too little tau, which is good overall but not for the study.

January 18, 2019 - New Year and we decided to be a part of a new clinical trial called Trailblazer.  We will meet on February 8, 2019 to see if Bob can participate in this trial.  It will last for a 1 1/2 years he will have to have an infusion every 30 days plus PET scans.  It is a drug trial that will try to remove the "beta amyloid" in the brain that causes Alzheimer's.  Of course Bob could get the placebo.  We put it all in the Lord's hands.

October 31, 2018 - It has been a rollercoaster ride, since Bob has been diagnosed with Alzheimer's.  We are in the Washington University study, Bob has undergone a lumbar puncture, 2 MRIs and a Pet Scan, blood tests and a sleep study.  Bob has not experienced any panic attacks since the last one in April, so that is good.  Bob is on Aricept for memory loss and I think it has helped him.  The only other new So far I think his progression is very slow.  Thank you Lord!  What I have noticed is I get asked the same question several times a day.  Things I tell him he forgets immediately almost.  His driving is still very good but the doctor explained that is a long term memory, so I am thankful for that.  I am noticing that he is having some trouble watching tv shows, especially if they jump from present to past, Bob gets confused.  We are coping and I just pray that Bob's personality stays intact, he is very laid back and does not argue with...

 March 26, 2016  - This was the first punch in the stomach for me. I call "punch in the stomach" a new realization or something that happens that makes me face reality when I have been trying to ignore it. Here is mine, it was Saturday before Easter and I just made my grandkids 5 Easter baskets and gave them to Bob to hide in the basement like he has always done. The next morning when the kids arrived, they asked if PawPaw had hidden the baskets and did he hide them in hard places to find. I said lets ask him, when we asked PawPaw that question, he said I don't know what you are talking about. I said remember yesterday when I gave you the kids Easter baskets and he said no! This was my punch in the stomach. My first with Bob, I knew then something was wrong. My son-in-law Nick went downstairs and found them just sitting all together in the back of the basement not hidden. Up to this time Bob was forgetful but just the normal stuff. I just thought he tuned me out, I was al...